Trump vs. Putin: Who would win this smack-down?

So, I finally got my hair cut today.  I haven’t had it cut since November 2014.  I know.  It’s pretty bad.

My hair stylist and I were talking about bad haircuts, so the conversation naturally turned to Donald Trump.  The guy is trending in the news today because he released Senator Lindsey Graham’s phone number to the public.  Trump is a jackass, but I have to give him credit.  He knows how to manipulate the media into keeping the spotlight firmly on him.

Trump is currently leading in the polls, which is mind-boggling to me.  So, my natural “what if” tendencies took flight.  What if Trump actually becomes a serious Republican candidate?  What if he wins the Presidential election next year?  As POTUS, he would actually be allowed to speak with people.  Like foreign leaders.  What if he actually speaks with Vladimir Putin, the President of Russia?

We would all be doomed.  Can you imagine Trump and Putin locked in a room together?  That’s assuming you could find a room big enough to house both of their large egos.

For the sake of this post, let’s assume that any conversation between these two men would erupt into anger.  There is already concrete evidence that one of them isn’t afraid to use force.  Just talk with someone from the Ukraine.  I admit that I have no idea how trigger-happy Trump is.  But it’s fair to say that if the two of them were talking, we would have two hotheads with an arsenal of nuclear weapons at their easy disposal.

Once I got past the images of complete and total annihilation of this country and the post-apocalyptic world that would follow, I thought it would be fun to picture the two of them in a ring.  Would they have access to weapons?  Or would it be mano-y-mano (hand to hand) combat?  I like it.  A gladiator fight between the two men without any other casualties.  I would even pay money to see that.  Maybe bring popcorn.  Sounds like a fun night in Vegas.

Let’s picture this.  In one corner, we have Donald Trump, who is 6’3″ and 69 years old.  And in the other corner, we have Vladimir Putin, who is 5’7″ and 62 years old.

So who do you think would win in a smack-down between Trump and Putin?  And is Trump’s hair an asset or a liability in this fight?  I leave it to your imagination.

UPDATE:  My husband is a killjoy who informed me that this wouldn’t even be a contest.  I forgot that Putin is ex-KGB and rides around bare-chested on horses.  Perhaps Trump can use his considerable wealth to hire a champion to represent him in the ring?